youtube

is totally contagious!!! i have been watching any and everything on youtube about health, beauty, and fashion!!! okay anyway thanks to youtube, i want to try and go NATURAL... omg just the thought of it kind of scares me, i am addicted to the creamy crack!!! lol i cant deal with new growth. I dont think i have enough power to totally transition BUT I think i want to stretch my perms out to just 4 a year and once im comfortable do the BIG CHOP and cut off the relaxed ends. ooooo and i am soo not a fan of dying my hair, i tried once and my bangs broke off!!! but i have been researching dying hair with HENNA, which is all natural and it thickens the hair so those are two very good things. I haven't have a perm since August and man o man am i over do due, but i figure if i can go for 6 months i can four times a year when i get back to califonia. it will be hard because both my hairdressers are back home, and i can basically get my hair done whenever i want by people i trust which i most def couldnt do out here in tn, bllehh we shall see. if you know me you know i change my mind like the weather, i am just not a big fan of change.

perfectly said.

:)

i think i am addicted to YOUTUBE seriously. i find the best things on there... this made me smile today, these girls are amazing at what they do, they are sister and need to be signed already!!!

excuse me while i rant and rave!

i am soo frustrated!!!! like hello, my walk with God is exactly that MY WALK ... just because it is not like yours does not mean it is wrong! NEVER HAVE I EVER CLAIMED TO BE A HOLY ROLLER AND PERFECT....I AM HUMAN! i am NOT PERFECT! I SIN EVERYDAY AS DO EVER HUMAN EVEN THE STRICTEST OF STRICT CHRISTIAN SINS! I will never be perfect just a work and progress as long as i live! ughhh and I am over people whining about America sending aide to Haiti, who cares where they are, they are human THEY BLEED RED just like the rest of us! And people want to comment we didnt do this for Katrina victims, did we raise this much for the Tsunami Victims blah blah blah. HOLD THE BOAT IF ANYONE PAID ATTENTION IN HISTORY CLASS FROM ELEMENTARY SCHOOL- HIGH SCHOOL they would have learned that The President of The United States is THE ARMED FORCES COMMANDER IN CHIEF... he calls the shot so its not about what we as AMERICANS DID OR DIDNT DO with those tragedies IT WAS WHO WAS IN CHARGE (PRESIDENT BUSH) who didnt get the ball rolling immediately and offer aide! I honestly think if Obama was in office at the time of both tragedies HE WOULD HAVE HANDLED THEM BOTH AS SWIFTLY AND EFFECTIVELY AS HE COULD, AS HE IS DOING WITH HAITI RIGHT NOW! -end rant!

waiting waiting waiting.

so i am apart of a group Army Wives on facebook and a woman posted a message that her husband is part of the 101 airborne at Fort Campbell and he is deploying Feb 6th... i messaged her and asked her what unit and company he is apart of and i am waiting for her to message me back, like i said in previous posts nick is at training for deployment and there is a possibility he may be deploying before the date that they were given... i know the Army well enough to know things change day in and day out... im just more anxious than anything, i think it would better if he went sooner so i can start the 365 day count down, im just ready for it to start and be done already. Everyone tells me to just make sure that i keep myself busy. That is exactly what i plan on doing. When i get back to California in March I can get back on staff with my old job, my boss told my mother that she is going to make room for me, i also plan to go to vegas for my 26 birthday and my younger sisters 21 bday and to also visit my sister and our cousin who also lives there, I need to visit my two friends Marie and Mona in Sacrament a few times this summer, my friend Cassandra and her new born son in Arizona and at the end of summer visit my friends in the DMV. I decided to start school in August when Jordyn starts kindergarden,I have the option of going 5 days a week 8-430 and be done in 5-6 months or go part time 8-12 and work a part time job and be done with school in 7-8 months, the counselor also told me that i can add another course that will keep my hours and requirements on track for our next duty station which we agreed on Hawaii i hope we get it. I want to keep Jordyn as busy as possible, i was looking on line and got info on soccer, cheerleading and gymnastics to keep her busy. Her puppy Enzo was born in December so I hope this next year goes smoothly and quick... im just basically ready to get it started already... bleeehh

Day Two :)

This morning I woke up around 8:30am slipped into my Sauna Suit and hopped on the treadmill for 35 minutes, a slow to a brisk walk that resulted in 1.5 miles, then i did a 30 min beginner work out for abs and legs, also with the sauna suit on. I never really sweat, and I hate to sweat it was disgusting taking the suit off. I did my Salt Water Flush on an empty stomach to cleanse my digestional track and that lasted for maybe two hrs. I took a long hot bath soaking in Epson Salt and then I took a shower. I am not expierincing any hunger pains and headache like other report in the firs two to three days of body detoxification. So far, so good, we shall see. I have decided to continue my 30 min light cardio on the treadmill and leave the fitness boot camp for after my cleanse, as suggested. I also found that drinking the lemonade which is 60 oz of water, 3/4 cup of Maple Sugar Grade B Organic and 1/2 tsp of Cyenne Pepper taste a million times better when I drink it ice cold, than luke warm. Before my husband left for JRTC he knew i was going to do the Master Cleanse and he wrote on the Fridge on our dry erase board "you can do it babe!", I smile every time I look at it. He can be the sweetest person ever sometimes. I actually am starting to miss him a little, probably because his mother asks me every other day have I spoken to him. Im confused at what part of 'he is in the field training, and sleeping in tents with generators' that she does not understand? I'm still reading Eat. Pray. Love by Elizabeth Gilbert and is getting more amazing as I read. I am reading this book at a slow pace because she drops so much knowledge and I want to retain it. 39 more days until Jordyn and I go back to California, I'm excited and anxious and also dreading packing. Hopefully my father in law can come down for a weekend and help us knock it out. ;)

dunn dunn dunnn

Today is day one of the Master Cleanse for me... The first sip threw me off with the pepper in all but hey, new year.. time to cleanse the mind body and soul... with detoxification.

my moments of zen

"Today I am a confused Caterpillar - and I am okay with that because I know that I am a work in progress. Soon to disappear into my cocoon of self discovery and spiritual hydration only to become a beautiful free, fulfilled, and blessed Butterfly some tomorrow." - JER

"Don't assume you know me. You probably wouldn't even recognize your own reflection in the mirror."-JER

"I remain silent, not because I have nothing to say- but because you amuse me trying to figure me out; where i've been, what I'm doing, and what my future holds."-JER

"I will continue to walk this earth with my cute lil nose stuck in the air, not because I think I'm better than you, but because I am better than who I used to be." - JER

"We spent 18 years of our lives doing what our parents wanted us to do. Then we will spend the next 18 more years trying to figure out what we want out of life, who we are, and finding our individual self, only to have the next 18+ years to we be who we are and fulfill everything we ever wanted."-JER

"There is no way you can build your bottom from the top, as hard as you try you will always end up at the bottom to build your way up, just remember when your looking up to smile and thank him"-JER

reading again, finally.

Ever since I was young, all I would do was read, read, read. My Father started me on a book club when i was around 9 or 10 and they would send me books like ever months, i want to say it was something like 10 books at a time. In High school I read all the time, My favorite book ever that we had to read in High School would have to be "The Color of Water" and "Othello." The last semester I had my entire High School Graduating class of 2002 reading "The Coldest Winter Ever" by Sister Soulja. That is when I became obsessed with African American Fiction. You could always catch me with a book in my hands, reading and walking down the halls of my high school. I read everything from Omar Tyree and Eric Jerome Dickey before the semester ended. My cousin and I shared a few academy classes and we would read the same book at the same time and then discuss them, then pass them on to other girls in our academy class to pass on a good read. We had a thing called Silent Sustained Reading for 20 minutes in the beginning of third period and for me that was English. Mrs. Weigle our teacher was a lil off but really cool. Right now I am reading Eat.Pray. Love By: Elizabeth Gilbert and so far it is amazing, and on deck is A Piece of Cake By; Cupcake Brown. I have noticed my love for reading, and my obsession of the library and book stores has rubbed off on my four year old aswell and it is a wonderful feeling. I always used to read to her in the womb and read to her while she was a toddler. Now that she is four she likes to read to mommy. She likes to make up her stories based on the pictures which most of the time are freakishly accurate to the original text. I'm a proud mommy of an extremely intelligent child. She also loves to draw, she is very well at it. When we get back to california I am going to get her in some painting classes. She has also picked up her first camera, her grammy and grammy got it for her for Christams and it is a big sturdy one that can take a few drops, it has a display and it also records short video. Rigt away she was taking pictures of everything. She is doing such a great job about centering the objects in her pictures, I almost cried, because she is also picking up another thing that Mommy likes to do on her own. Awww. I cant wait til we take walks just the two of use with our cameras. I'm just a very proud mommy, and i want her to pull everything that is great from me and everything great only:)

Soooo

today i have decided not to turn on the television at all, i know id turn it to cnn and be in here crying all day watching what is developing in Haiti. My heart and prayers go out to anyone who has been affected by this unfortunate tragedy. God bless them all, including those who have come to their aid. Poverty is a day to day life in Haiti and now on top of that it has been struct with so much heart ache and pain. Innocent people have lost their lives, but there is sunshine after the rain. As unfortunate as it is this tragedy may bring stability to the country, basically re-building it from the ground up with buildings and houses that pass code. They say what does not kill us will only make us stronger.

I fell upon this Video spoof of our President Obama! I love it, it is super cute, i found myself reading the words and singing along, i was in here jammin! Yep, this hot mama voted for Obama. Now put yah hands up! oo ooo ooo oooooo :)



I also spoke with a friend of mine back home whose boyfriend is in the Army and stationed at Ft. Hood, she said that he was training for deployment to Iraq in September, but now got word they are getting ready to ship to Haiti to help with relief. I'd personally pick Haiti over Iraq or Afghanistan anyday. She is just sad because she was supposed to visit him for Valentines day. Life of a military wife or girlfriend, "hurry up and wait." My husband is a Combat Medic and is currently in Louisiana doing JRTC for up coming deployment in Afghanistan. I haven't spoken with him since he left 8 days ago which i knew was going to happen because he is in the field, but for all i know they could have mobilized them to Haiti. Ehh that may be a stretch be he is part of a medical detachment for 101 Airborne, who knows. As of right now, it has been easy thus far with him not being here, Jordyn and I have fell back into the same routine we had in california before we got married, when it was just the two of us. It is easier for me, because she knows the deal and does not try to push the envelope and see what she can get away with like she does when her dad is around. I have her in check and the sassy-ness and back talk is down to a minimum. Which is great, i havent had any real big issues with her. I know she misses her dad, boy does JoJo love her some Daddy, but she understands that he is at work. 3 more weeks and he will be going home. I spoke with my mother in law and she let me know she is no longer going to be able to keep JoJo in SC for two weeks while we pack in Feb because she is flying back home to california because they found fast spreading cancer on her mothers lip and she needs to be with her, and i totally understand. Jordyn is a lil sad though because she was so looking forward to spending two weeks at her grandparents house, but we will be in cali before she leaves so we will see here regardless.

Joke or sick and twisted reality check?

PRAY FOR HAITI

I am so sad for the people of Haiti right now. All I can do is pray for them and donate what I can. It is heart breaking watching the aftermath of the earthquake, the video and pictures are killing me softly. My mother is also from an island in the Caribbean and a lot of her family lives on a few different islands and this so could have happened to any other island. I am greatful that I wasnt personally affected but saddened that anyone had to be affected at all. Life is short. The world is coming to an end before our eyes and GOD will walk this earth once again sooner than we think. HE is coming. God Bless the People of Haiti and anyone who has relatives suffering there right now. President Obama put it down and addressed the nation early this morning. ON POINT! No we are going to try and do this and that. He basically said, look here is what we have in motion, this is what we are doing to help, this is who i am sending, and help is on the way... we will help our neighbors Haiti! One word... "SWIFT!" I wish I could say the same for our previous president BUSH retard.

snowed in...blehhh

so its been snowing lightly since Thursday about an inch or more I guess. It was fun for the first day, I really wish it would stop now. Lol. I am a California Girl and I cannot handle this, its been like 14 degrees and under. Brrrr. I'm so scared to drive in this weather especially since my husband says the night he leaves for JRTC "be careful I haven't rotated the tires." Great! Thank you husband, leave it to him to keep up with his vehicle. Lol, and he thinks that he is going to pawn his 07 Chrysler Seabring off on me when he gets back from deployment and get something else. NO SIR, not going to happen. For one, i hate white cars, two you treat it like your personal dumpster, and three I don't want your left overs. SERIOUSLY, his trunk is always full of all his army gear and most of the shit stinks most of the time, i am cool.

Jordyn and I have a serious case of cabin fever! We just need something to do! Somewhere to go. We get out of pajamas to take a shower just to get back in pajamas. Totally cannot wait til we are out of here 51 more days. I watched 'It's Complicated' and 'The Stepfather" today and I think I will watch 'The Box' before bed.

....The sink in the kitchen decided that it wanted to start leaking today! Way to wait until the husband is gone for a month! I wouldn't even care if we had a property manager! Which we don't and the owners live in DC, all I know is I am not shelling out for a plumber, I AM STILL WAITING ON THE WINDOW IN THE LIVING ROOM TO BE FIXED SINCE JULY. Paint and New fixtures fooled the shit out of us, but thats for another post.

.....

weird! i never thought id actually care about missing him come home and tell me about his day! lol most of the time i just stare at him and think to myself "i wish he'd shut up already" ... lol I am bored on a Friday night. I am going to put a facial mask on and start reading one of the books i have laying around the house.

Day One of Thirty

I dropped Nicholas off at his friend Banks' house tonight so I didn't have to get up @ 330am to take him on base so they could get on a bus to Louisiana for JRTC. I have no idea why I was kind of scared sleeping last night without him somewhere in the house. My mind was playing major tricks on me, for some reason I swore I was smelling something burning and walked around sniffing my house like an idiot. Jordyn is way excited that she gets to sleep with Mommy for a month! She loves my bed and also loves taking over my television. It is really quiet so far and I love it, we shall she how long I can deal with it. I have one week until I start my Master Cleanse and 2 a day cardio session work outs. I decided to wait until Nicholas was gone because I wont have to cook nearly as much and the temptation will be easier to ignore. It's time to shed some lbs, cleanse my system, get into a regular work out routine and re-wire my eating habits. Now that I am 25 the lbs are coming on easy and harder coming off. Yesterday it snowed enough for Jordyn to go outside and play in it. All she wanted to do was make snow angels so the snow could be pretty. She didn't care that her fingers were purple and her nose was red! She said it was the best day of her life in TN. lol. She's funny. We played in the snow twice yesterday and she is sad that I refused to take her out today, but its freakin 14 degrees outside. I HAVE NEVER FELT 14 DEGREES IN MY LIFE THAT I REMEMBER! All my joints and muscles are all stiff, I can feel the arthritis in my shoulder, hip, and knee more so than ever. I AM AND ALWAYS WILL BE A CALIFORNIA GIRL! 7 weeks and Jordyn and I will be back! When it started to get colder here I had to ask my husband if he was sure that he wanted to re-enlist for Germany! He comes home and pumps the heat and takes long showers and still cannot seem to get warm. We agreed that Hawaii will be our first choice for re-enlistment! Jordyn and I and all our family members are excited about that! I wish we could fast forward 16 months already. But I cant, one day at a time.

My mom called it...

Every time I talk to my mom she always asks have I heard anything else about Nicholas deployment? I keep telling her, all I know id that they ship out some time in Afghanistan. My mother and my father both served twenty plus years in the Army and both retired so they basically know they stuff. She kept telling, more so warning me that all they need is 48 hours notice. Well Nicholas comes home today and tells me that the company that they are supposed to be replacing in Afghanistan are scheduled to come home this month, YES JANUARY! And there is a possibility if they cannot find another unit to cover the area for three months then it is very possible that they will leave for deployment early, like right when they get back from JRTC in Louisiana. They leave for training this Friday for a month. Okay, yes I am freaking low key because there is just so much stuff to get done in such little time, which will leave room for lots of error. The devil likes to play too much. My minds all over the place. I remember posting about how my husband and I got into an argument because I told him that the last month we should have to pay rent should be February and he went off about how he signed a lease and he cant stay on base blah blah blah... lol Well today he brings it up to me that we have to call our landlord soon and let her know we have to break the lease which is fine because the owners are military and we signed an military clause. Anyway he's all I have to ask my Srgt if I can stay in the barracks for a few weeks before deployment or maybe one of his battle buddies who live off base will let him stay with them until deployment. I just kind of looked at him like "are you serious!" That's the same shit i said to you at dinner on Christmas and you tried to go off. But now that you feel like its your idea then ita ll good. I just had to let it go. He just has a problem with admitting that I am right, which I am most of the time! :) One day he will learn. As long as I let him "think" everything is all his idea than everything will always go my way. Now I have to make a to revise my to do list just in case. Stressed out is what I am.

cabin fever :(

I am in a really stank mood for some reason... I just downloaded Ke$ha's Animal Album. I love it, this is going to have major re-play in the skull candies. She reminds me of old school Avril with a lil Katy Perry and a dash of Lady Ga Ga! :)



o, and I am like addicted to the confessions on www.lipstickalley.com.

:)

Sometimes Mr. Renfrow does the sweetest things ever. This morning after PT he came home to pack the rest of his stuff for JRTC and made Jordyn breakfast so I could sleep a little longer. Before he left he tucked me in tight because he said it was 11 degrees outside and kissed me on the forehead and left back for work. I got up to find Jordyn also tucked in her bed watching cartoons. These are the little things I will miss. I tell everyone all the time he can be the sweetest man ever on earth and he can also be the biggest douche bag as well :) Last night before bed I watched an Indie Film Amreeka. It was nice, I like indie films. You should check it out if you have some time, its the same website I watch all my movies on.

Hooahh

Nicholas got pinned today, he is now Specialist Renfrow. Yay for that. By the time he gets back from deployment he should have the points and be ready to go to the board for Srgt. He has been enlisted for 18 months he went from a private to specialist that quick. The man know how to do his job, and is very proud to be serving in the Army. I'm excited for him, he works hard and deserves. Today he told me that they will be leaving on Friday for JRTC down in Louisiana for a month for some good ol training before he deploys. That time will be here before we know it.

grrrr.

I cannot deal with inconsiderate ass people I fuckin swear. Right about now I cannot WAIT until he is gone for training for a month! This whole spending a lot of time together is driving me NUTS! The noise is driving me, him ALWAYS in my face and everywhere I turn is driving me nuts. His stupid comments are driving me NUTS! Uggghh. Any freakin way. I cooked he didn't eat with us, he was too busy playing poker or whatever online, ON MY LAPTOP because he royally fucked his up! Whatever. Basically, WHATS YOUR'S IS MINE AND WHAT'S MINE IS MINE PERIOD! I'd love for him to come home tomorrow and tell me they are leaving fr JRTC the following day! We shall see.

what would i do without music

I LOVE ALL MUSIC. I listen to the lyrics more so than who the person is or isn't. There is always THAT one song that relates to your life at that particular time, it is comforting knowing that someone some where is or has gone through the exact same thing you are or have. It makes life less lonelier. I wish John Mayer and Me'Shell Ndegeocello could sing the sound track to my life. Their music and voices can take me many moons away. I could honestly listen to music all day long, doing absolutely nothing but listening, feeling and relating. Over the recent years passed I have found all kinds of new artist just by watching mainstream television and shows. Grey's Anatomy, One Tree Hill and So You Think You Can Dance never fail me. Almost every time I tune into one of them, I am googleing words of a song that I heard just to hear it from start to finish and searching for more from that artist. Right now I have been playing Priscilla Renea every night on repeat, her music is totally my style, a little bit of R&B a lil rock, a lil acoustic, a lil alternative. I have just come across an R&B singer by the name of Chrishan and am currently listening to him in my skull candys as we type. I always have ear phones in , it is my way of drowning out the world and letting the music take me away for as long as it can before I am interrupted by my husband or daughter yelling "wife" or "mommy." Such a sweet escape. Today I have been bored out of my mind, and it is freezing outside. Jedidah and cold weather do not get a long. I am from an ity bity city on the water in California and although it is not Hot like Southern California it does have its days in late October- December. Weird huh. I miss the 50-70 degree weather all year long though. I am so over the cold weather here in TN. I have never felt what 18 degrees felt like until I moved here and I hate it with a passion. It makes me not want to get out the bed, better yet get out the house. This weather is making me realize that I am not as young as I used to be. My body, bones, and joints ache. Past injuries I was able to ignore back in Cali are making themselves known. My left knee and left shoulder are so tight and the pain is crazy at times. But hey, I always get carded and told I dont look older than twenty so I will smile, bitch moan and complain and try and take it with a grain of salt. Before I end this quick post because nothing eventful has happened to me today, I was wondering if anyone else got so bored they caught an attitude! LOL mad for no damn reason, I can't even blame it on Aunt Flow because she brought her ass through here last week! I can't stand that red headed broad but I am relieved when she does show her face- because I would be in a world of shock if she didn't show up- if you know what I mean. Oh yeah, today I watched two good movies on line. Yes, I am one of those who would rather watch a movie on line in my warm house on my comfy couch than go to a cold ass movie theater and freeze for two hours. Anyway I watched Lovely Bones, it was a good movie, I wish I knew there was a book before I watched the movie because I would have most definetly read the book before watching the movie. It had a Vanilla Sky feel to it, and yes being a parent, I could relate and I did drop a few tears. That's what parent hood does to a person who once used to shrug the world off, it makes you an over protective, worrying, sensative sun of a gun! lol I will be that. After that I watched Drew Berrymore's first film Whip It. I loved it! I have loved Ellen Page since I saw her in Juno. She is beautiful and I love her quirky IDGAF attitude! Anyway Check these movies and artist out when you get a chance, you will love them!